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Adesua, Banky Speak On 3 Failed IVF Attempts

Evaluation of decayed twin embryos , 3 failed IVF Procedures, suffering from Polcystic Ovary Syndrome and indicating symptom of unfunctional sperm morphology , all these made up the life story of Adesua Etomi and Bankole Wellington as they narrate their stuggle of having a child before the birth of Zaiah.

The two love birds shared their heartbreaking moments at the Waterbrook Church in Lagos during this year’s Easter Sunday with a message tagged -‘Final Say Faith’

Speaking to the congregation, Adesua Etomi said after the marriage in 2017, they planned immediately to start having kids. But each month became a bundle of disappointment after trying to get pregnant for 11 months and a couple of days.

In her words, ” It was like a monthly disappointment, and trying to stay in the place of faith and knowing the God you serve, but for some reason, He was kind of slow. It was really tough, I was dealing with pressure .

“Every single day of that two and a half years of waiting to have a child, someone sneered me every day. I could not have an opinion without someone saying ” go and born”. I could not say anything without someone saying “get out, go and have a child, you are barren. “

She said every single time she was accused of these words, she would go back to God to pour out her pain. The actress hinted that her dilemma affected her mother who is a pastor, anybody who was close to the mum could taste the agony which was tangible.

Adesua recalled telling God not to make her go through such devastating situation. Because ” The experience was a monthly sorrow and that was really tough “.

After trying to get pregnant for one year, the couple decided to go through the IVF(In -Vitro-Fertilization) procedure.

“IVF is a very tasking emotionally, physically and it is very very tough and very very hard,” Adesua said.

In the process of going through this procedure , people on the internet were still backslashing the couple with unworthy names like impotency and barrenness.

The procedure eventually made them pregnant with twins and everything was going well until the end of the trimester when their joyful lifeboat suddenly got deflated..

They actually went for a scan and discovered the heartbeats of the twins were no longer heard. This was the sad reality they had to come in terms with.

Adeswa hinted that the husband and herself had to still go back home after receiving the bad news and they believed in God for a miracle of bringing the twins back to life but sadly, the next scan revealed that the embryos had started decaying and they needed to be evacuated from her body.. This was another excruciating pain the actress had to go through.

Banky W said -“When we found out that we had to do an evacuation, it was a very emotional time for us and on the day of the evacuation( removal of the dead embryos) ,we cried together”

While sharing this part of their story, they shed a couple of tears which reflected the trauma they had gone through together in having these children. The experience that couldn’t be expressed in words but their tears said it all.

Banky W said even though his love language is Act of Service, in the state of dilemma, there was nothing he could do to fix the problem.

After the first attempt of IVF failed, the couple went for the second round which eventually did not scale through. They didnt give up as they tried the third time but yet it was unsuccessful. At this point, the medical reports had its own sad tale

” The doctors said I had Polcystic ovary syndrome, POS ( a condition in women characterized by irregular or no menstrual periods, acne, obesity, and excess hair growth). The medical report also indicated that Banky’s sperm morphology were not right.

After the third attempt, I said I am not doing again. I am not taking any single drug, I am not taking any single injection. I am not doing anything anymore. If God gives me a child, praise Jesus but if he is not giving me any child, that’s okay,” Adesua said.

According to the couple, they realized they did not seek the face of God before embarking on these procedures. So they decided to wait on God for one year without trying to be medically pregnant

In Banky’s words- “I remember looking at the medical bills and report and feeling it was not God’s will for us”

In the midst of trusting God, the couple disclosed that God started speaking to them through His word, vision and godly counsel.

Adesua revealed that she was involved in the Hallelujah Challenge by Nathaniel Bassey and they also prayed fervently for others that were facing challenges in life.

However, their waiting on God paid off when they welcomed their Miracle baby, Zaiah in February, 2021.

Just in Adesua’s words- ” Olubakole( Jesus has done it) “

Mercy Obot

Mercy Obot is a journalist, entrepreneur and an inspirational writer who takes delight in emboldening people through real life stories. She also loves reading, listening to cool music and making friends globally.

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